Alone I would not have committed that theft, where what pleased me was not what I was stealing but the fact that I was stealing. Doing this alone would not have pleased me so well, nor would I have done it. O friendship so clearly unfriendly, untraceable seducer of the mind! It was a craving to do harm as a sport and a joke, an appetite to wrong another person, apart from any desire for revenge or for my own gain. It was just that someone said “Come on, let’s do it” – and one is ashamed not to be shameless.”
-Augustine of Hippo, Confessions book II
A person’s teenage years tends to be regarded as a time of great confusion and soul-searching. We all deal with it in some form or fashion, embracing some archetypal social role in order to fit the greater whole of our environment.
Myself? I was a Nerd. A Geek. A Boffin. A Swot. My days were mostly consumed with unanswerable philosophical questions, learning foreign languages, biology lab, awkward music lessons, and fencing with sabers. Or what I like to call “Guaranteed Boredom for 95% of the Planet unless Wes Anderson decides to direct the movie.”
In this respect, our dear Augustine of Hippo had an adolescence much closer to the modern norm. He was in the throes of lust for the fair maidens of his hometown, looking for things to brag about to his friends, and not above committing a bit of unnecessary petty larceny – the theft of some pears.
And that’s where the focus of today’s blo gpost will be on – as the communal theft of a neighbor’s pears resulted in Augustine meditating on the nature of friendship, crime, and sin.
Many historians often seem baffled by the amount of space Augustine devotes to examining this particular incident regarding the theft of pears. After all, Augustine and his accomplices were never caught nor punished. However, Augustine seems interested in dissecting this whole incident to illustrate the psychological nature of his crime and the social context of his sin.
For those who have been following this Turn Inward blog post series, one may recall that a general theme of the last few posts has been the nature of friendship. Augustine the Bishop reflected on his adolescent attempts to “fit in” with his social group in the following manner:
..that among my peer group I was ashamed not to be equally guilty of shameful behaviour when I heard them boasting of their sexual exploits. Their pride was the more aggressive, the more debauched their acts were; they derived pleasure not merely from the lust of the act but also from the admiration it evoked. What is more worthy of censure than vice? Yet I went deeper into vice to avoid being despised, and when there was no act by admitting to which I could rival my depraved companions, I used to pretend I had done things I had not done at all, so that my innocence should not lead my companions to scorn my lack of courage, and lest my chastity be taken as a mark of inferiority.
-Augustine, The Confessions, Book II
I think that every adolescent has experienced these feelings at one point or another. Augustine was attempting to “be one of the boys” so to speak. And this attempt would eventually lead into the theft of the pears, as indicated by the quote at the top of this blog post. It is interesting to note that Augustine the Bishop regarded these early relationships as parodies of true friendship. Why parody? Referring back to our examination of Cicero’s On Friendship, true friendship was comprised of the following criteria:
- True Friendships occur between good people, as sound and enduring friendships are built on virtue.
- Friends do not ask each other to do anything “dishonorable.”
- Friendship is about the movement of Plurality to Unity.
And in all three criteria, Augustine the Youth’s so-called “friends” are found lacking. What we have instead is simply a peer pressure group.
The theft was a nothing, and for this reason I was the more miserable. Yet had I been alone I would not have done it – i remember my state of mind to be thus at the time – alone I would have never done it. Therefore, my love in the act was to be associated with the gang in whose company I did it.
However, while Augustine the Bishop acknowledges that this peer pressure group is part of the context for his transgression of morals and laws, it isn’t the driving force.
I stole something which I had in plenty and of much better quality. My desire was to enjoy not what I sought by stealing but merely the excitement of thieving and doing what was wrong. There was a pear tree near our vineyard laden with fruit, though it was attractive neither in color nor taste. To shake the fruit off the tree and carry off the pears, I and a gang of naughty adolescents set off late at night after we had continued our game in the streets. We carried off a huge load of pears. But they were not four feasts but merely to throw to the pigs. Even if we ate a few, nevertheless our pleasure lay in doing what was not allowed.
-Augustine of Hippo, Confessions book II
Our Older Bishop Augustine takes a moment to reflect on this point. More often than not, crimes and transgressions are committed toward some sort of purpose. A thief could steal food to feed himself. A murderer may slay a rival in a desire for wealth, property, or love. In many ways, these transgressions are distortions of proper activity to achieve these ends.
But this theft of the pears – it had not greater purpose. It wasn’t even a distortion of an activity for a purpose. In his own words “I was not seeking to gain anything by shameful means, but shame for its own sake.”
But the question is – Why? Why did it feel so good at the end of the day?
Augustine answer may sound surprising to us – for he says “Pride imitates what is lofty, but you alone are God most high above all things.” He then proceeds to enumerate characteristics and things that humans seek and how…ultimately… we are trying to emulate God. Some examples might suffice:
- Curiosity appears to be zeal for knowledge – but God already knows all.
- Luxury seeks abundance/satiety – but God is the giver of incorruptible pleasure.
- Prodigality is the shadow of generosity – but God is the bestower of good things.
Etc. etc etc.
For those of a non-religious bent, I might offer up a reasonably close interpretation: This is about Feeling Free.
Specifically, feeling free from Rules. As in, human beings tend to like it when Rules exist – except when those Rules apply to them.
In this respect, Augustine hits the nail on the head. Transgression of Law (Moral, Civil, or otherwise) speaks to a kind of illusion of Freedom. In a certain sense, one is essentially parodying the power of divinity, which to the ancient mindset is the only Thing/Being/Whatever that is Truly Free.